Monday, February 14, 2011

What does Valentines Day mean to You?

Due to the logistics of the last week, my husband simply didn't have the opportunity to buy me a card for the traditional card swap on Valentines Day. With true regret he told me yesterday that he had failed to buy the card and he was truly sorry. Without even thinking twice I said, write me a note, I'll appreciate that more!

I've been married to the same man for almost 26 years. We've had our fair share of up's and down's ~ especially the down's. We've lost both sets of parents over the years, my career took me away from home most of the time, and finally our constant separation did nothing to strengthen our marriage.

We all have personal beliefs; we hold grudges; we have negative thoughts and we believe ourselves to be "right" during confrontation, be it direct or passive aggression. I am guilty of all these things. It is with those thoughts and feelings, and believing I was "right" that five years ago I simply left. I mean I really left my house (the one where I spent little time), my husband who I didn't recognize as the man I married, and everything I knew as "normal."

I spent the next four years alone with a cat and a dog. I traveled 300 days a year for my job and had a personal assistant to take care of my house and pets. I lived over 500 miles from the husband I left. We did not divorce as I couldn't see the point since neither of us had expressed an interest in getting married again. When I was home, I wasn't unhappy, I was simply not happy ~ and I didn't know why.

One day, almost a year ago, I picked up the phone and called my husband. Our stilted conversation was less than romantic ~ but it was a conversation none the less. Two weeks later he called me with the sad news that "our" dog, Miss Sofi was dieing of cancer. I was broken-hearted as she was the dog we got when living in Acapulco. I just had to see her one more time before she died.

I drove the 500 miles and to my amazement my husband was standing in the driveway with a wide grin on his face. He was actually happy to see me! I spent the weekend with our sweet Sofi and my husband, and returned "home" on Sunday. I knew after that weekend that I had made a serious if not irreparable mistake! On Monday morning I sat down and wrote a 13 page (single spaced) letter to my husband.

After he received my letter I received a tearful telephone call...and the rest is history! Today we live, love and appreciate each other. It's our first Valentines Day in years (and I'm counting the other 21) that feels loving.

Needless to say, I remembered weeks ago that the day was coming so I bought several cards and made a scavenger hunt out of it this morning!

I love you sweetie!


  1. Aww, that's so sweet. Congratulations on this new stage in your life and your marriage. :)

    Happy Valentines Day!

  2. How sweet congratulations to you!!! I feel so's all about the chocolate for me! LOL - My husband and I see each other every day though. 17 years and we are still laughing - can't be too bad. I'm pretty low maintenance. Happy Valentines Day to you and yours : )

  3. What a wonderful story!! Thanks so much for sharing it!

  4. Great story. Happy Valentine's Day.

  5. Love how honest this is... and LOVE the ending. :) Happy happy day to you and your sweetie!


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